Matt's Version

I guess maybe it's time to finally publish Matt's version of Frankie's birth.

I love seeing how differently men and women write.

And check out the date on this bad boy! He finished writing his before I even finished mine!

Awesome!!!

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Childbirth experience.

29 March 2010

On Tuesday March 23 I went to bed while my wife, Michelle, and her sister stayed up watching TV. It was about 10 pm and I had to work the next morning.

At 1:30 in the morning, I woke to the sound of our bathtub running. Got up and found Michelle in the tub with a clock, her phone, and some pregnancy books. She was timing. Michelle told me this is it, and that the contractions were very regular. I think they were a minute long, separated by 5 plus minutes. I may not remember that exactly.

I asked Michelle if we need to leave for the hospital now, or should I get more rest. She told me to do what I wanted. So I tried to go back to bed, but I couldn’t sleep. I went back to Michelle.

Michelle now said, get ready, we got to go. So I started to get the last items on Michelle’s checklist. I tried to be smooth and calm because I wanted it to be a calm experience.

When I was ready, Michelle said it was not necessary to rush to the hospital yet. I asked her more because I was confused if we needed to go, or wait. She said, I need you to start helping me make decisions now. This told me that her body was busy getting ready for the baby, and I need step into my roll as her helper. I decided that we need to go now.

We live about a mile from the hospital. So just before 4 am I drove, being very careful about speed bumps, turning on the air and driving directly to the Emergency enterance. Michelle was complaining about nausea during the drive.

I walked into the ER and said my wife was in labor. Michelle stayed in the car. They took her name and asked if I needed a wheelchair. I said Yes. So they sent a Tech with a wheelchair.

I parked the car while the Tech took Michelle to Delivery. Michelle was in the rocking chair when I got to her room. Michelle had moved to the bed when our nurse, Joyce (I’m pretty sure that was her name), came in. She introduced herself nicely and then, without notes, said to us what she was going to do as if she were following our birth plan. Joyce never mentioned the birth plan, but she had obviously read it. She said, I will not offer you any pain medicine unless you ask for it first, I will discuss with you before we induce…and so on. I think she even said what our Doctor said, natural births make our job easier.

So the nurse checked Michelle, who was going through contractions. Nurse said Michelle was 9. Suddenly there were 2 or 3 more nurses all very busy. Michelle said she was going to throw up, and the nurse rushed a container that was too small to be much help. All of Michelle’s dinner came up while I held her. The nurse got a second container. Vomit got all over the side rail. The nurses talked about cleaning it up, but they were so busy, I asked if I could volunteer to clean it up. I used paper towels and a small amount of hand soap, then I dried it. I didn’t want Michelle to smell that during labor. Michelle felt better after thowing up.

I began to fan Michelle after that, and she seemed to like it. The only thing I found to use was a brochure about the hospital. I fanned till the baby was born.

A nurse came in to get Michelle on an IV (with a hep-lock, that’s probably not spelled right). This nurse was very good about suggesting to Michelle how she can turn around, prop herself up, looking over the back of the bed. Michelle wanted to get out of bed, but the nurse wouldn’t allow it because she said that Michelle was buldging and only a bag of water was keeping the baby in. As good as this nurse was with helping Michelle find the most comfortable position, she was not great with Michelle’s IV. Michelle’s veins came and went and the nurse poked her twice to finally get her IV.

I talked to Michelle about how calm we got when we imagined relaxing, and that now was the time to save her energy for the pushing. Michelle didn’t want anyone to touch her back and she let us know that clearly. She wanted her legs gently touched.

Dr. Tilly walked it. Very calm. Quietly talked to nurses and Michelle. Checked Michelle. Said to the nurses, She’s full, at 10.

At some point, Michelle laid back on the bed normal (even though the nurses said that they could deliver if Michelle wanted to stay in a kneeling position looking over the back of the bed).

Michelle asked if it was alright to push. The Nurse said, Yes. During the push, a dull pop happened, and greenish-reddish fluid came out (some going as far as the far end of the bed). I think the Nurses said it was probably the bag breaking. Michelle began to say it was stinging.

Dr. Tilly calmly directed nurses to take places and adjust the bed. He directed Michelle to hold he knees and to not push with her feet. Michelle said it stung and could others hold her knees. The Doc clearly said, you have to do this.

So when a contraction happened the nurses coached Michelle as to what pushes were effective and what didn’t work. “You are pushing with your feet, push the baby.” The baby’s head came out, just hair at this point. And the Doc and nurses coached Michelle through a few more contractions. I was concerned because the baby looked very blue, but come to find out, she was normal.

Michelle even said, “it stings, can you just pull the baby out.” The Doc and nurses said no and coached clearly and directly to Michelle on how to push.

I don’t think Michelle pushed more than 4 times. Each time lasting a minute plus. Once the baby’s shoulders showed, Dr. Tilly easily helped the baby up and out. The Doc and nurses did their work, and I got to cut the cord.

Note that the baby was born exactly one hour after we arrived at the hospital.

I stayed with the baby while a new Doc and nurse checked the baby out. They were very careful about telling us what they were doing and asked what we wanted.

I noticed that Michelle was bleeding. Dr. Tilly and the nurse were working the bleeding. Later, when I asked Dr. Tilly about it, he said that he used Pitocin (spelling?) and another drug to stop the bleeding. He explained that your body develops a resistance to pitocin quickly, so if we had used it during labor, 2 or three more drugs would have been used to stop the bleeding. So, by going naturally, we saved Michelle from being exposed to 2 extra drugs unnecessarily. He also said this was normal for a 4^th baby.

My thoughts:

Michelle said she wanted a Natural Birth. I didn’t know what that meant. And I didn’t have time to figure it out. The Bradley class was nice since the class reviewed everything during the 10 weeks. I didn’t have time to do the homework, but I think I got what I needed out of that class.

I would have brought a fan, and practiced putting my wife’s hair up.

I also would have called the florist and have the flowers, balloons, and card waiting to be delivered. Some patient got Dunkin Donuts for the nurses, and they really liked that.

I probably waited too long to take Michelle to the hospital. She was progressing faster than I guessed.

I would have a sick-sack in the car. We didn’t use it in the car, but she got sick once in the hospital bed.

I’m very happy with the lead nurse, the nurse staff, our doctor, Southern Maryland / St. Mary’s county Hospital, and our Bradley class.

I should point out, that I went in with the attitude that I was going to stand behind Michelle’s wish for a natural childbirth. And my ultimate goal was to have a healthy and happy Mom and Baby, even if that meant using pain medicine or medical procedures. I’m saying that if Michelle and her doctor thought she needed something, I was going to do what Michelle thought was best. So I feel like I got the best of both worlds because Michelle delivered naturally, quickly, and with a healthy and happy baby. And we love Frankie-Baby!